If there was ever a few words that really got to me it was when my whole committee all agreed, "He shouldn't do it." The last thing I wanted to hear was that I shouldn't complete my project. Completion is a value in my life. If you don't complete anything you won't get anywhere. I feel like I'm getting no where. I have to put my process on hold. For the time being I can't move forward in my actions. I feel like a failure. I can't do anything but sit back in my seat. I can no longer finish my project physically.
The worse part is that I know that the best thing for me to do is just sit here and heal. But can you see it from my eyes: When you learn to do something, fall in love with it and then be forced to stop; it does something to you as a young man. I sat there shook in fear and cried hoping for the words to be changed around. Just tell me I can finish; I don't want to let myself down. Sweat coming down my chest as the tears rolls down my cheek. I'm fighting myself mentally and physically to make sure I stay in my seat.
I honestly just want to be healthy and finish this project. At my meeting today we agreed that can still do the 5 self defense techniques and that I am still responsible for the Prezi and research paper. And instead of me doing the live demonstration then we will record Antonio and I will explain step by step what's going on. I guess it's a good thing that I have a lot of pictures and some videos then because I can't make any more as of now.
I am on the road to success still but it's just really hard for me to pull these things together. Everyone knows if there is anything I want it is to complete this project, so I'm going to put all my efforts into completing the final things. And It's not going to be easy. I have to watch when I am a hands-on person. This project is really testing every side of me.
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